Saturday, 28 June 2014

'Like a girl'

This morning just before my long awaited holiday to Nice in France I watched a great advert that showed how the term 'like a girl' had had such a negative affect on most females. I had to quickly write my thoughts I felt so angry with how this had impacted so many. Will update with links later.

'Like a girl' when did this become such a negative term?
I am a girl, well now a middle aged one but still I once was a 'girl'. I had no choice about my sex I was born into this body. It's served me well thank goodness. But my abilities and strengths like a man are based upon my ability, not comparing myself to another person of my gender and certainly not comparing myself to a 'male counterpart'.
My very 'meness' (I don't care if this is made up) is bound up with my sex.

Now this is not to negate the battle those people who are transgendered and have to fight to be who they feel they are. But this is to ask seriously why is 'like a girl' such a derogatory term?

I have probably heard it used this way most of my earlier life but I remember the first significant use in the context of a fundamentalist church from Australia in a preach that fuelled me with immense anger.
The preacher scolded the males in the congregation for thinking and acting 'like a girl', the derogatory terms were also used for 'Gay people', we were 'lumped together' under this umbrella of 'not quite good enough' in fact for some, being female/Gay was to be despised by these 'men'.

Fast forward 20 years and approximately 2 years ago I hear a teaching from pastor Mark Driscoll from Mars Hill Seattle ( I was hoping to hear Rob Bell, but downloaded wrong Mars Hill) and guess what?
Yep Pastor Mark had a whole bunch of expletives and vitriol for his male counterparts and a number were using 'like a girl' or female imagery to display his disgust at those he felt were getting it wrong. Yep we females are just Wrong!!

Never mind the fact that it's the female who gave birth to every male that has ever taken a breath.

So I would ask everyone both male and female to think before you use this sentence.
Everyone to not label yourself with limits that are defined by your sex. You are you, your strengths and weaknesses are no one else's business.

Let's abandon this negative term for the sake of all future generations of  girls/women, for the sake of my amazing granddaughter Chloe.

For my wonderful grandsons Malakai and Jack, who will learn why this term is not acceptable and hopefully by their example teach others this also.

Love Bev


  1. Hey honey. Look at all the females in the history of this family of ours. All able. All strong. All doing life to the best of our ability. Am one proud Girl. :-) Lesley

  2. Thanks Lesley you are so right we have some feisty girls in our clan :-)
    I still think this needs to be addressed though. You must like me have heard this term in reference to weakness not our strength. I will keep reclaiming all I can for our beautiful daughters x